the year is 2046. no one has memed in 15 years since king obama the third make memeing illegal. in the dystopian suburbs of fort lauderdale, sixteen year-old Dogecoin de Grasse Sagan found a sexy fedora in an trash dumpster. he put it on and it made a sweet anime noise. he knew then he, was destined to bring memes back to this stupid idiot planet. he looked at the camera and goes “u mad, world?”
today is bi visibility day. as such, bisexual people will be completely visible for the next 24 hours. this is a bad day to engage in bank heists, ghost impersonations, covert operations for vague yet menacing government agencies, and other common bisexual hobbies that rely upon our powers of invisibility.
the only domestic instinct my parents have managed to pass on to me is the tendency to hoard multiple plastic bags in another plastic bag despite the fact that I will probably never need this many plastic bags in my adult life
Kindergarten: Stupid. Oh gosh don’t tell anyone I said that. Elementary school: What the heck. Middle School: Damn it this is freaking dumb as hell High school: what the fuck did you just say you little fucking shitbitchcuntfuck I will beat the dicks out of your ass
College: what the frick frack snick snack are u doing